Our Journey #1: The Call

When I married Braden, I'd had very little experience with military life. I knew he was a soldier, that his dad and brother were soldiers, and he was proud of being part of his family heritage of serving our country. That was one thing that endeared me to him. I admired his courage and patriotism (and the way he looked in his uniform didn't hurt either). As long as I had known him, his military service consisted of a one weekend a month commitment to the Army National Guard, and in my naivete I assumed that was all the Army would ever take from our lives. For a year-and-a-half, that's all they did take, aside from an annual two week training and periodic three or four day weekend drills. 

We busily started our lives together, having our daughter 11 months after our marriage and working toward saving up money to buy our first home. My husband worked for a successful woodworking company, making his way quickly up the ranks to a management position. I was happy and content as a stay-at-home mom, spending my time with our baby girl and playing homemaker.

We found ourselves pregnant with our son just 11 months after our daughter was born, and we were thrilled. The timing was perfect because we had finally saved up enough for a down payment on a perfect little first home, and were waiting to hear back from the sellers on whether or not they would accept our offer.

Life was working out perfectly for our little family, just as I had always dreamed and planned. 

And then the call came.

I'm not sure if other military families experience "the call" the same way we did. Usually, military units hear rumors that they will be called up for weeks before the actual orders, so they have some time to mentally prepare. Braden, however, had been serving a mission for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints when his own unit had been called up, so his name was on a list of reservists available to fill in for other units in the state that performed the same job as his, called "sister units." And it just so happened the Braden's sister unit needed some spots filled in. 

So for us, the call was a little more like a punch in the gut: unexpected and out of nowhere. I remember him answering the phone with his usual, "This is Braden," and then his tone getting very official and respectful as he spoke to someone who was obviously a commander of some kind. Braden grabbed a piece of paper and pencil and wrote down "Iraq, 3 weeks" and showed it to me. I whispered "Are you serious?" and he nodded his head. I immediately burst into tears, wanting to hold onto him and hope this was all a bad dream. Braden turned away from me so his commander wouldn't be able to hear his wife sobbing into the receiver. I ran to the bedroom.

So many thoughts tumbled through my mind. I was four months pregnant, we had just put an offer in on a house, our little girl was just starting to talk, he would be missing so much. How were we going to do this? How was I going to do this?

We withdrew the offer on the house and decided I would move in with my parents while Braden was away.  We filled the next three weeks with as much quality family time we could cram in. Extended family came from out of town for get-togethers, and our little family of three stayed glued to each others' sides. I didn't realize how happy and sad I could feel at the same time. Every night we fell asleep, I felt so blessed to be in his arms and so sad that one more day had already passed until he had to leave.

The first goodbye was the easiest. Braden was only heading out to training stateside for a couple of months, so we knew we'd be together again for a little bit before he was shipped to the Middle East. We didn't know yet how painful it would be to spend even just a few weeks away from each other. But we still cried and held onto each other until the very last moment. I held our little girl up to the airport window where I hoped he could see her and we waved bye bye to Daddy until the plane was long gone.

During this time in my life, and during many others, our light and hope came from family, friends, and neighbors. We were and are so blessed to have supportive, compassionate, loving people surrounding us. I cannot count the amazing acts of service, the kind words, the cards and gifts, and the constant offers of help at any time of need.

I would rely heavily on these amazing people during this time and in the years to come.